Puppy Photos
Photographing a new puppy isn't
as easy as it may first sound...
Remove film from box and load camera.
Remove
film box from puppy's mouth and throw in trash.
Remove
puppy from trash and brush coffee grounds from muzzle.
Choose
a suitable background for photo.
Mount
camera on tripod and focus.
Find
puppy and take dirty sock from mouth.
Place
puppy in pre-focused spot and return to camera.
Forget
about spot and crawl after puppy on knees.
Focus
with one hand and fend off puppy with other hand.
Get
tissue and clean nose print from lens.
Take
flash cube from puppy's mouth and throw in trash.
Put
cat outside and put peroxide on the scratch on puppy's nose.
Put
magazines back on coffee table.
Try
to get puppy's attention by squeaking toy over your head.
Replace
your glasses and check camera for damage.
Jump
up in time to grab puppy by scruff of neck and say, "No, outside! No,
outside!"
Call
spouse to clean up mess.
Fix
a drink.
Sit
back in Lazy Boy with drink and resolve to teach puppy "sit" and "stay"
the first thing in the morning.